After a weekend filled with the sweetest and kindest guests, almost a thousand visitors came to see my house during the weekend! The walls still echo of kind words, so many people said thank you for letting us visit. The most photographed feature (after my bathroom door!) was a row of coffecups hanging from my waterpipes in the kitchen. The fact the last cup is just a piece of a cup, made people smile and I was almost declared a genius for the idea, hilarious! I made the hooks of wire.
So here it is, the most photographed feature at #LillaLjuva.
Yesterday me and L travelled to Helsinki. We started off with dinner at my absolute favorite thai-restaurant called Lemon grass. Delicious food!
Then we walked down to the shore, to the Huvila-tent and enjoyed a wonderful evening of music and dance. The evening started off with a finnish artist called Aurora, she has had a few hits, likeable yes, but her songs had very little variety unfortunately. Here is one of her hits called Se soi, enjoy!
And then Neuza hit the stage, what a charming and charismatic performer. And the band! We danced and we were happy! Here is wonderfulDjar fago, enjoy! The evening was warm, 20 degrees, one of those august nights that we will carry in our hearts.
This performance was part of the ongoing Helsinki festivals. For finnish readers, here is a review.
The picture above is of sweet Neuza signing autographs after the performance, we were given permission to photograph her.
I travelled to Helsinki and attended a first step in a tantra course. Please hold your horses, tantra is not only about erotic, it is so much more. It is also erotic, but mainly it's about love and connecting energies. I have practised tantra for years, on and off. Like I do yoga, I sometimes do tantric yoga. Tantric exerciseas are so good for the body and it is meditative and fun. I haven't previously written about my tantric intrests (I did my first course back in the 90´s in Stockholm), mainly because I have noticed how poeple react to when I talk about tantra and I usually feel a need to explain. I get a lot of jokes about it too. I can take it. But to write about this in a forum where people who do not know me read this and might get an idea that perhaps doesn't correlate with reality. Oh my. But I cannot control what other people might think. And does it matter? People tend not to be intersted and I am by no means an exception, that somehow somewhere people would lie awake in their beds at night and think and wonder about what sort of tantric exercises I practise...
After the course I met up with my dearest M. Dinner was ready when I arrived. We walked up to the attic, from there we climbed onto the roof and enjoyed a lovely dinner overlooking the rooftops in wonderful evening sun. Delicious salad, beetroot soup, bread with hummus, ginger beer and french toast with ice-cream and jam.
What a wonderful sunday and I was so happy when I returned home late with the bus, and a certain darling L came to meet me, lucky lucky me. So very spoiled human beeing dancing on this planet. Life!
My house is part of an open house event organized in the little town I live in. I will not mention the name of the event, so to not spill any of this rather otiose matter upon this charming and lovely event. It is widely popular and I had almost thousand guests last year when I was involved for the first time. All of the visitors to my house showed great respect and they were all friendly, kind and warm.
Except for one person.
The ex-wife. She informed me by sms that she would like to visit my home. Asked if it was ok. At the time I tried to be kind towards her, even though she had made my life rather difficult and ugly by all sorts of rules regarding where I was allowed to be, walk and whom I was allowed to talk to. Seriously. We agreed upon so many absurd demands from her. I thought at the time that part of her behaviour did smell a lot like stalking, but I was too exhausted to do anything about it. So I responded to her sms, that I didn't think it was wise of her to visit my house and that this was not the platform for a meeting nor would I be able to speak to her. She instisted she wanted to come and threatend by writing she would come, regardless of what I said, as she had a right to enter any of the open houses as she had a ticket.
I was too tired to argue the matter with her. And did not know as a first timer, that that is utter bullshit. She has absolutely no right to enter my house without my consent. As the owner of the house, I get to choose who enters.
So, she did arrive and she made such an awful dramatic show of it all, she even hugged me and soon wrote about it in her blog, as to show and tell everyone what a generous person she is, she wrote it herself in her blog, "jag är en storsint människa". That she has hugged me. Makes me sick when I even think about that awful day. That is not generous. That is forcing others to your will. It is utter abuse.
Due to her behaviour since, we do not trust that she will not play this ugly stunt on me again. Even though I have written to her and told her that she is not welcome to my home during this open house event. I have gone through what happened last year, shown her messages and sms regarding this matter to the organizers and they thought it wiser to provide my house with a guard, with the right to stop her from entering the premises.
But, I think it is such a bloody waste of resources. The guards should be in places where there is real need. I do need a guard as I will never again let this person into my home and she cannot be trusted. She has lured her way into my home once, and we need to make sure it will NEVER happen again.
She has regularly since their separation and divorce reported on her blog and facebook-page, where we have been seen, what we do etc. Due to the fact that I appear regularly on her blog, I have been the target for internet-trolls and hatemail. She carries no responsability for this, she only states her right to write about her feelings. And plays the innocent victim.
I have asked her (several times) not to write about me, that I do not wish to appear on her blog, so she no longer uses my name, she refers to me as her ex-husband's new love (and by this nobody guesses who she refers to, where is her logic????).
The one thing I am thankful for, is that the renovation of my home was far from ready last year, so her presence has not left any vivid memory, rooted in any room. And all the other almost thousand friendly and generous persons who payed a visit, they left kind and suportive words, that I never wanted to wash away nor wish to fade away.
This year, my home is almost ready. I shall welcome every visitor with open arms. And this year I will not be abused nor forced to hug people I have no respect for.
I feel priviledged to be part of this lovey event, even though some of the resources, in my opinion, are beeing wasted due to this matter. I'm glad I have finally managed to create boundaries against internetbullies. It is about time!
The chair above, is a picture taken by me, the almost identical image can be found on her blog last year and the facade to my house. I shall not link to her blog, as she also uses statistics as a measure for why she has a right to write about me. Her blog has been rated a hateblog due to her washing her dirty laundry in public and several rasist posts. One does sometime wonder why, why write lies and why constantly balance on the border of what is politically correct, what is ethicly right, not to mention, morally? Why does one get kicks from beeing provocative. The reason lies in statistics. Provocative texts attracts readers. Attentionseekers christmaspresent.
A divorce is never an easy matter, but it surely doesn't become easier when you go public about assumptions and utter lies.
This shall be the last post about this matter to ever appear on my blog. She was a thorn in my side, but due to creating these and other boundaries alike, the thorn is finally gone!
Edit 21.8.2015. The ex-wife has only once appeared on my blog, I have written about her once. Here. It is called Black cloud.
My veranda is slowly taking shape.
Now the floor has been vaxed, I placed my wooden sofa on the veranda. For a few years I have planned and dreamed of a wooden lid for it. Easier to sit in the sofa and perfect storage. So now my dream has come true! Last night, me and L, built the lid. I covered it with a vintage fabric and voilá, a perfect palce to sit and enjoy a cup of tea, read a book...
This morning I enjoyed my breakfast here, as it was a little bit chilly to have breakfast on the terass.
Happy happy joy joy!
I, personally, believe love is everywhere. You just need to open up your heart and dare to be yourself, dare to be vulnerable. But you also need to give. Unconditionally. If you are greedy, or only want acceptance, then you are not open for love. Then you are open for other things, often criticism and that doesn´t heal a soul.
I have always been a very lucky soul, to have been a target for much love and I have been given so much love in life. I do love, too much at times, but rather so than not loving at all.
So. this sign in my kitchen is in my opinion a perfect portion of a reminder to open up for love with all it's beauty, as well as cocky, let love come, I'm ready to take on the challenge of love -sort of way. Because you need to work on all relationships, nothing and nobody should be taken for granted.
Låt kärleken komma is the last words in a favorite song by Eva Dahlgren, Innan kärleken kom. Here sung by another darling, Helen Sjöholm.
After a weeks holiday in Parga, Greece and a well needed pause from social media, I am back home and started work today! I always find it healthy to step away from social media. I find it healthy to check my own social media behaviour, my own addiction to it. Happy I am far from addicted, I even consider to step away more often and for longer periods.
We, me and L, had a wonderful time together.
Parga has a wonderful landscape, surrounded by mountains. Beautiful olive plantation up in the hills, we did not hike very far this time, but far enough to see the variety of the landscape. We saw lemontrees giving fruit, we saw people sitting in their chairs outside their houses. Small houses and small gardens, small narrow streets.
The weather treated us well. We were overwhelmed by the genuine friendly people we met, the tastes and the sounds, the beautiful turqoise water, the crickets, the velvet nights, the stars, the lights, the narrow roads. By serenity.
So much good stuff happening in life at the moment.
Wonderful people and so much love and love and even more love.
Today we, me and L, organized a small venue to thank all our guests this summer at the kiosk, so many people turned up and we spent the whole day outdoors in the sun, enjoying coffee and buns and ice-cream and how lucky we are to be surrounded with all this kindness and warmth.
We later had the most wonderful evening with dear friends and relatives, delicious food and wine and when cykling home we just smiled and sighed, life is so good!
Take care! Love to you all!
Above are roses I received from J. Tack finaste!
And look, my windowsill that I purchaised for 2 euros (Seriously! And it was the exact length as my window) at the fleamarket is now in place on the veranda. I cannot wait to fill the window with geraniums and lacecurtains...sit in my wooden sofa, listen to LP's and drinking tea with honey (L brought the most wonderful green tea as a gift when he travelled to Tallinn a few weeks ago, he even brought the most wonderful ginger-jam, and we have enjoyed it on Digestive cookies), looking out at the soft august nights with lit candles. Oh yes, bring it on, we are ready!